


Wish You Were Here

by knuckles___00



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Album: Wish You Were Here (Pink Floyd), Hogwarts, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:20:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27341872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/knuckles___00/pseuds/knuckles___00
Summary: 9 years of friendship destroyed.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 1
Kudos: 8





	Wish You Were Here

_So, so you think you can tell  
Heaven fringe hell?  
Blue skies from pain  
Can you tell a green fiel  
From a cold steel rail?  
A smile from veil?  
Do you think you can tell?_

So many years Remus had spent with this man as a friend. Nine years. 

The first four years Remus had spent trying to push down feelings, wanting nothing other than to be friends. And he had been happy with that. It had been wonderful: Pranks, detentions, classes all spent with Sirius, and the other Mauraders. Remus knew he couldnt leave James and Peter out of this, they'd been there as well. Just not as present as Sirius in Remus' mind.

There had been many duo pranks between him and Sirius, he couldnt name the majority of them. He knew Sirius could without a problem, but he had always had a sharp memory when it came to pranks.

The last five years Remus had let all his feelings drop out of him bit by bit, starting with his feelings for Sirius.

He hadn't meant to let it slip, but drink Remus had a completely different mind than sober Remus.   
_'Oh, what a birthday that had been.'_ He would think to himself ever now and then.

And what a birthday it was. His 'Sweet Sixteenth', as Sirius had liked to call it.   
In the drunken state he had been in, he had kissed Sirius. He didnt remember certain details, just that it went uphill from that point.

They had gotten together the next morning after Remus woke with the other in his bed. It had been a long talk. (Sirius had missed quidditch, which nearly made James implode.)

But Remus wouldn't have asked for it any other way. It was perfect in his eyes. Absolutely perfect.

_Did they get you to trade  
Your heroes for ghosts?  
Hot ashes for trees?  
Hot air for a cool breeze?  
Cold comfort for change _

The war was at its peak.  
It was weighing on Remus. He barely got any sleep then; "Too much research to be done, too many missions to finish." Remus would answer whenever anyone asked why he looked so tired. 

He had moved in with Sirius at this point. It was nowhere special, just a one bedroom flat in the middle of London. He hadn't wanted more, and Sirius had complied with what he had asked.

But now, even in such small living quarters, the two barely saw each other. They were always out or busy or too tired to do anything. This lead to many fights in spare time, followed by many apologies and gifts exchanged afterwards. But it was getting to be too much for Remus.

He wanted Sirius back. He wanted everything back, like how it had been at Hogwarts. They didn't have the pressure of the war on their shoulders at all times. He didn't have to worry to terribly much about the full moons.   
But kow it was so different. Painful, even.

_Did you exchange_ _A walk on part in the war For a lead role in the cage?_

There were so many things Remus wanted back; A peaceful nights sleep with Sirius, pranks with his friends, a conversation without the topic of the war.  
The list went on and on and on. Remus didn't think it had an end.

But the one thing at the top of that list was Sirius. Padfoot. The happy, energetic boy he once knew had been replaced with a hollow shell of that. There were no more, 'I love you's or kisses on the cheek.

Just silence. 

_How I wish, how I wish you were here We're just two lost souls Swimming in a fish bowl Year after year Running over the same old ground What have we found? The same old fears_

Remus couldn't believe it.

The love of his life, the man he'd trusted with all his secrets, even his own life, had betrayed him.

Now, he had no one. Two of his best friends were dead, and his lover was rotting in prison.   
Yes, Remus knew he deserved it, but deep down, he had a feeling there had been a mistake. But all the evedince pointed towards Sirius.   
It had been Sirius. He was the reason James, Lily, and Peter were dead. He was the reason Remus was all alone.

 _'But, Sirius had left all the bad stuff behind,_ _hadn't he?'_ Remus thought to himself, hoping that it was true. He hoped he would get an owl, saying there had been a mistake, that Sirius had been innocent.

But years had passed. No owl.

Remus cried every night, begging for something, anything to prove that his lover was innocent.

But, the evedince never came.

~~~~~~~

Every full moon that passed only made Remus' world fall harder. He was alone, when just years ago, he had been with his best friends every full moon.

He couldn't be reminded that he wasn't a monster, that he couldn't control the werewolf in him. 

He was left with his degrading thoughts and so many new scars. 

He couldn't look in the mirror any longer. All the new scars reminded him that he wasalone, and the ones that had been there before only reminded him of his friends. It was awful. 

~~~~~~~

Remus still didn't know how he could cope with it all till he got the letter from Hogwarts, asking him to teach Defense Against the Dark Arts.

 _'Maybe this was his chance',_ He thought as he walked into Platform 9 3/4. But, when he took a seat in one of the train carriages, memories rushed over him like a flood.

All he could think about were the days of The Mauraders. The pranks, the detentions, the friendships, the relationship.

He cried. Silently, but he cried.

His cheeks were hot with tears as he sat back and closed his eyes. 

_Wish you were here_

**Author's Note:**

> uh,, thanks 4 reading,,, also,, I wrote this for my boyfriend :)))  
> i also apologize for the song lyric parts, they're a bit messed up, and i apologize for it being so short


End file.
